Completely lost it this morning prior to work - spilt my whole breakfast tray, fruit juice 'n' all, off the breakfast bar and over myself, and then went on a 10 minute swearing bout whilst Lord H hid in the bath. I was just soooo cross, and all the frustrations of the last month (no news from Flame Books - http://www.flamebooks.com - on the publication date of "A Dangerous Man"; no news on whether anyone likes "Maloney's Law; no word from my agent - http://www.sff.net/people/john-jarrold/about.html - on publisher responses to "Thorn in the Flesh"; no news on whether Pighog Press - http://www.pighog.co.uk - like my poetry collection; the general feeling of being a failed writer and nothing literary ever working out for me - God) spilt over into a frenzy of rage and tears. Lord, and I hate Mondays anyway. Thank goodness, Lord H and I managed to have some kind of healing conversation before we both had to get out of the flat.
The rest of the day was pretty crap, all in all. We were in a room the temperature of an ice-box for the Steering Group lunchtime meeting, and I just got worse and worse, health-wise. By the time the meeting was over, I felt like lying down and giving up entirely. But necessity meant I struggled through the beginning of the write-up - though my boss took pity on me (thank you, David!) and said I didn't have to minute the last item, which was very confusing and went on for ages, as it would all be changed soon anyway. Lord, I must have looked sick ...
This evening, I was at the Goldenford (http://www.goldenford.co.uk) "Crossing the Genre" event at Barclays - part of the Guildford Book Festival (http://www.guildfordbookfestival.co.uk). It went surprisingly well - but how I hate doing these things as I'm not a natural at presentations - and Lord H, Liz & Robin turned up (huge thank you, guys ...) - and we even sold some books, though not "Pink Champagne and Apple Juice unfortunately. Lord H made me feel terribly humble as he turned up with an identical version of the shirt he thought I might have ruined this morning - Lord, he's way too nice for me, which is something I've always known of course!.... But it was great to see him, and our day has ended well. Marriage - where would I be without it, eh? And it was nice that one of the Barclays people said how much she was enjoying "Pink Champagne and Apple Juice" and looking forward to seeing how things went. And - even better news! - they've invited us back for a Christmas reading event at the end of November. Result!
Today's nice things:
1. Lord H's kindness
2. The Goldenford Barclays event