Wednesday, October 04, 2006


A long day, but not as bad as yesterday as I'm now neck-deep in sorting my current project out (a student mentoring manual). Once I've bashed it all in on the keyboard, I can get down to putting things in the right order, which will (probably) be easier than choosing what actually goes in. I hope ...

Lunchtime was my counselling session with Zoe - in the new Counselling Centre, which is much nicer than the old one. We talked about finding the hidden "me" (which basically feels like a screwed-up male in his twenties/thirties who's not terribly obviously "nice") and bringing it to the surface more - rather than pretending to be a nice, relatively normal woman in her forties - and even as I write that description, it seems like a lie. Hell, sometimes, I feel I'm living a shadow life and somewhere out there this bloke I carry inside me is living his real life in a much fuller and more energetic way. Maybe that's why I write about him all the time. Even in my head, I call him "Michael". The closest book to the way I feel about myself has always been "A Dangerous Man". Now I'm beginning to understand why.

A fairly quiet evening lies ahead - probably a good thing. Sean, my editor at Flame Books (, is just sorting a few bits and pieces out for the printer, so maybe that publication date is soon in the offing. Hope so, anyway! It'll give me something to look forward to, which would be nice.

And we're hoping to mend our leaking toilet soon - Ruth at work has given us lots of ideas - thanks, Ruth - and I really hope one of them solves the problem.

Today's nice things:

1. Counselling
2. Moving forward with the publication of "A Dangerous Man".

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