A wobbly week

Life News:

It's been a bit of a wobbly week, being back at work this week, I must say, and I don't think I've been my usual jolly self (ho ho). My head is so full of vast quantities of stuff that it's proving really tricky to sort it all out so I haven't really been trying. Office tasks seemed very long and complex when they probably shouldn't have been, plus I'm worrying (well, it's after Lent so I'm allowed to) about when our flat exchange date might be, if our buyer is going to hang on or give up, if we'll still be able to go to the rental property we like if we do suddenly have to move or if we'll be homeless, and whether our removal firm can fit us in even though I'm unable to explain anything useful to them at all. On top of all that, we're now seriously looking at other houses again if we can fit viewings in as nothing's moving on the house we've "bought" and it's been three months now and still no sniff of an exchange date, and the vendors' solicitors are being as unhelpful as ever, sigh. I honestly can't now remember what we liked about it, and neither can K really. It feels like a purchase someone other than us has made.

Anyway, today we've seen two other houses, one in Knaphill which we did like but K thinks it might be the "safe choice" and there's nothing that individual about it even though it's well within our price range, so I'm probably keener than he is. The other one in Pyrford was okay but way too near the main road, and therefore too noisy, which we both hate. On Saturday K is going to see another house in Woking that he's really keen on but I can't go as I'm seeing a friend in Kent. The plus points for that one are it's quiet, in a nice area, and there's no chain (though I understand the tenants are rather tricky, so that's a bit worrying), but it's over our budget and I'm a bit worried by that. Well, we'll see, eh.

It's rather disheartening as K and I promised ourselves last September that we'd be out of this flat by my birthday for sure - but as that's only a month and two days away now, I fear there's not much hope. In that case I suspect a tear or two will be shed when I reach that great milestone, birthday or no birthday, ah well. On the other hand, when we get to September and we're still here (goddammit), I suppose I can bake a one-year-house-hunt-failure celebration cake. What joy.

This week, I've also had my regular appointment with the doctor to see how the anti-depressants are working. Well, what could I say? I just told her I was having a wobbly week due to being back at work and period etc (sorry, too much information, probably ...) and decided to leave the rest of it unsaid as I couldn't think of the words. No doubt the wonder pills are making things better on a personal level than they otherwise would be, so thank God for small mercies.

Book News:

Sometime this or next week, The Gifting should, I hope, be published, so I'm busy preparing a launch party for, I think, sometime early July. I'm hoping to hold that at Godalming Museum but obviously it depends on schedules etc. I've got a list of about 40 people I'd like to invite, so with a bit of luck I should get 25 or so coming at least. I've just got to think of something to say and which passage to read. Best get my thinking cap on then.

This week's meditations are:


Meditation 526
The only ones mentioned
are the leaders
and the fighters.

Nobody thinks
of the cooks, the plumbers,
the gardeners or the writers.




Meditation 527
Shaharaim divorced
two wives

granting them shame
but also their lives.




Meditation 528
The fewer the words
the greater the thought

for it is in the spaces
that wisdom is caught.




Meditation 529
Long-forgotten names
are like stars:

a distant glitter
at the edge of your eye,

a strange coldness
patterning the sky.

Anne Brooke